For all of those that have been here before you'll know that this is the year of my big 3-0. You'll also know that I've been absolutely dreading it. I've honestly found the idea of saying goodbye to my 20's simply mind-boggling. Where did those years between secondary school and now disappear to? Like some kind of Harry Potter wizardry, they were gone in a whizz, flash and Expelliarmus.

The problem with turning 30 is that beforehand, it's absolutely terrifying. 

30 seems so far away when you're younger. A distant number which represents the epitome of being an adult. Young Becky definitely thought I'd have a couple of kids, a mortgage, an amazing core group of best friends, a decent pension fund and a stable job by now. Oh, and I would definitely watch the news of a morning (not re-runs of Fraiser), involve myself whole-heartedly in political debates, listen to radio 4 on the daily commute and basically just be a stand up stellar member of society. 

Then all of a sudden within a blink of an eye you reach the latter stages of your 20's and you suddenly start to get that sweaty palmed panicky feeling that you're about to turn 30 but you still feel 18, you definitely don't have any key milestones ticked off, and that actually the News and Radio 4 are in fact, duller and more depressing then Eastenders.

As much as I've spent the last year actively worrying about hitting the big 3-0 I've come to realise that it really isn't so bad after all. Mainly, because in your 20's there's a whole load of pressure. Pressure to be having fun continually (and putting it all over social media for people to envy from afar), pressure to look a certain way, pressure to be building the foundation blocks of your future, and the need to please absolutely everyone.

One of the major positive repercussions of turning 30 for me has been not caring as much. I guess you could say I'm a whole lot more confident than I was in my 20's. And not in a hair flicky I'm amazing type of way but in a quietly self-assured way. And this is the most wonderful thing about your 30's. Whether it's the benefit of just being that little bit older and more experienced, you start to give less of a shit. Mainly about other people's opinions of you. Because, actually it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks as long as you're happy. And I am.

The main reason for this? Well, I actually really like myself: I'm a good person, I'm a good friend, I'm caring, I work hard, and I enjoy myself. I'm happy in where I am in my life and happy with the person I am. Sure I don't have all my ducks in a row but you know what? Screw the ducks. If you have a list of the things you thought you would have accomplished by the time you were 30, write a new list. Better yet, burn the list. I truly believe comparing yourself to others can only lead to a negative head space. Haven't had that promotion? Even though your best friend has. Haven't got down to your ideal body size? Stop beating yourself up! You're trying your best, and your life is your own to live within your own time scale. You do not need some phantom life hanging over your head, taunting you that you should be skinnier, you should be married or should be more successful.... All by the time you're 30.

Instead, what you can be doing is allowing yourself to enjoy your life, no matter where it’s taking you. 

Hitting 30 doesn't mean you'll have discovered all there is to know about love, life or 'adulting', but hopefully you will have picked up a few things over the years and hopefully (fingers crossed!) there will be many more years filled with adventures and lessons to come.

So, I'm going to embrace this new chapter of my life and be thankful for everything that's happened up until this point. Who knows what the future will hold. There are no guarantees (other than more wrinkles and slightly lower tits) so I'm going to embrace every minute of being 30. After all, it's been a pretty good ride so far.

Love, Becky x

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